It has been a while since I have written anything here and I was going to post something here about what’s next. I have been planning on returning to the dirtbag life and staying in it until it no longer made sense. I was going to write a more personal blog post on fear, risk, and adventure. I was going to leave for Utah in just a couple weeks. But you probably noticed that all of these plans are all written in the past tense. That is because this happened:
My cousin, Adam, was visiting and I wanted to introduce him to climbing. I was bouldering and took a bad fall. There was popping noises, slight grinding sounds, and lots of pain. I am glad Adam was around to help me, but I do feel kinda bad that was his welcome to climbing. (He was crushing it by the way)
Today I got into the doctor’s and they say it is a torn ACL. It will heal one day, but that day feels very far away. There is a fair bit of pain, but the toughest part is the mental aspect.
This definitely takes my plans and tosses them out the door. I was going to climb in Moab, UT this spring and I was offered a spot on the American Alpine Club June workweek in the Tetons. I was really looking forward to connecting to more climbers and wanted to focus more on alpine climbing. On my last trip I had days where things didn’t go as planned. I learned that they are not bad days, just unexpected days. But it is harder to convince myself that this is “just unexpected” instead of “just bad”. Maybe this will lead to something better, or maybe it is just bad. Maybe it doesn’t matter. All I know is I am going to need to fight to get back on my feet. And at the end of all of that, perhaps I will get to write that blog post about returning to the dirtbag life with all of the fears and joys it brings.